The things you think are right in an abusive relationship are some of the things that make the relationship dangerous. This is a statement I heard today and I completely agree.
People can find themselves remaining in a toxic relationship much longer than they should because they do not understand that what appear to be calm, loving moments, in actuality are part of the abuse cycle.
Largely contributing to the phenomenon of toxic positivity or toxic hope is the idea that the "good" times signal movement in the direction of a better relationship. On the contrary however, the abuser benefits from this thinking because it allows them to continue to enjoy the benefits of relationship with someone who loves and cares for them, while all the while they have zero intention of true repentance. A "better" relationship will remain elusive.
The "good" times are just crumbs that the abused spouse settles for while day after day, month after month, year after year life is drained from them.
If this is your experience, please take some time to truly evaluate your life and your relationship. Yes, it takes two people to make a marriage or relationship work, but it only takes one person to destroy it. Both people have to be committed to the Lord and to the health of the relationship. God does perform miracles, but He does not override a person's decision to ignore His healing, resurrecting help.
You deserve to be consistently loved, cherished, and prioritized. You are a daughter of the King, fearfully and wonderfully made, and ordained to fulfill a great purpose. Place your hope in the Lord and allow Him to show you the truth about your relationship, as you learn more about the abuse cycle. Then ask Him to give you the courage to respond accordingly.
I am praying for you.
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