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Seeking Legal Advice & The Role of Faith




Have you considered seeking legal advice because of the suffering you are enduring in your marriage, but are hesitant?


Is one of the reasons you're hesitant, because you think to investigate your legal rights is somehow a reflection of small faith?


If so, please think about Proverbs 27:12 and the points that follow.


The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it. -Prov 27:12


  1. Seeking legal advice does not automatically mean you want to pursue divorce. It does not reflect a lack of faith in God's ability to save your marriage. It does not reflect a lack of faith in God's ability to provide for you.


2. Your job is to protect your children. Your children need you. You are the one who is

looking out for their best interest. It is important to understand the best ways to do

that. Some of those ways have legal ramifications.


3. It is misplaced trust to believe a person will suddenly start doing the right thing when

his behavior has been telling you he is untrustworthy.


4. It is naive to assume that a man who helped produce a child will act in the best

interest of that child when faced with legal decisions just because he is their father.


5. You may feel uncomfortable discussing spousal and child support, but you must

know that - especially if you have been home with the children - you have every right

to be supported in your objective to care for yourself and your children.


6. You have to recognize that you do not know everything. The Word says, With the

advice of many counselors there is success, Prov 15:22


7. Mediation is not advised when dealing with a narcissistic partner. You must

understand the legal tools available to you when mediation inevitably breaks down.


8. At some point you have to navigate the hopes and dreams you have had for your

family with more sobriety in the face of behavior that is clawing away at those hopes

and dreams. You must remain sober and vigilant. (1 Pet 5:8-9)


9. You also have to deal with the reality that no matter how much you fast and pray and

believe, God will not override a person's right to choose. That includes choosing to

reject Him and His ways, which sometimes leads to divorce, sadly.


10. Narcissists, especially, like the theater of court. They already are or will be getting

legal advice. You should, too. You also need to be prepared for the high likelihood of

legal shenanigans with the narcissist.


Remember that while your spouse is not your enemy, he or she can be under the influence of the enemy, and this enemy wants to steal, kill, and destroy your ability to fulfill God's plans for your life. Don't let that happen. Protect your children from this goal of the enemy, as well.


Never forget that God cares more about saving individuals than He does about saving institutions.


God wants us to be wise as serpents and gentle as doves. Understanding how to protect yourself and your children against destructive forces - including within your own family - is wise.


I share how I approached one part of my own legal challenges in Perspectives on a Divorce Trial.


You Matter. Your Voice Matters. Your Story Matters. Your Valley Will Be Exalted and Your Triumph Will Bring Glory to God.

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